It's About Time

We homeschooled, my boys and I, through some of the primary school years. The reasons were varied.  I wanted to spend time with my children, to ensure that their individual needs were being met, and to have some control over the information and ideas they were exposed to at such an impressionable age.  But the biggest reason was I wanted freedom. Being told what to do and when to do it was oppressive to me; an affront to living our lives.  The intent was to be in sync with our natural rhythms and impulses.  Not to avoid doing work, but to do it when we were in the best state to be successful.  Just like when I would try to get up and exercise at 5:30am I couldn’t do as many repetitions with the weights as I could a few hours later.  Sometimes math is easy, and sometimes it looks like arbitrary unintelligible symbols.  At times ideas would flow for stories or art projects, other times the conditions were better for an excursion in the garden. Wearing pajamas we snuggled up on my bed with history books, retaining the information as if it were the plots of our favorite bedtime stories.

Five years ago with a divorce impending, I had to send my children to school and I accepted a job in a call center.  A position that required that every minute of my shift to be planned and accounted for, down to the time you can get up to go to the bathroom.  It was a difficult transition for all of us.  But I needed a job, newly single and a recession starting. Not long after, I was promoted to the person in charge of the schedules.  The person who hates being told what to do and when to do it, now creates the schedules for over a hundred people and monitors the results in real time.

The upside is I've learned the value of a schedule; learned that most of the world runs better if there are people where they are supposed to be and engaged in the tasks that are expected of them.  But these times still need to be bookended in freedom.  Openended time where we are living in the moment and following the path that we are drawn to. Playing, exploring new interests and talents.  I'm looking forward to the day when I'm completely in control of my schedule again.  Making the most of my time as I see fit.